Turnbull Receives Petition With 24 Million Signatures: Still Finds Excuse To Ignore It.
On the steps of Parliament House today, Malcolm Turnbull was greeted by a small army of Australia Post workers carrying packages containing a staggering 24 million verified Australian signatures.
The unprecedented petition was organised by Melbourne’s lower upper west east LGBTQ community and appears to include a handwritten statement by nearly every single Australian in support of the measure. It was accompanied by a summary sheet produced by the Australian Bureau of Statistics documenting a 99.98% participation rate.
Mr Turnbull appeared staggered by the delivery, looking like he was expecting a picture of a dog from eBay instead of the blunt demand from nearly all Australians.
The petition demanded that the Marriage Act be changed from “between a Man and a Woman” to “between two adults”, and was signed by nearly every man woman and child in the country.
Turnbull held a brief meeting with journalists about the document. “Look I was expecting a package from eBay, which is why I opened the door, but this is not about rights or equality. People don’t know what they want. This petition does not represent all Australians. It only represents the opinions of a minority group. I committed to have a plebiscite, and Labor forced me to ignore that, because as you know I am 100% supportive of our LGDVD community. As you know, as PM I’m obliged to watch out for the interests of everyone, and the people of Australia I think don’t want this. Come back when you have 100%.
When reminded of the 99.98% participation rate, he replied ” Well as you know, that 0.02% of people is important too. Most of them are probably my party.”
Tony Abbott took a moment from his busy schedule of winking at sex workers to rib Mr Turnbull about the petition.
“Mal, when you get a petition that’s more effectively managed than your own census, you have to give them a fair hearing” he assholed, clearly forgetting that his party changed the Marriage Act specifically to outlaw gay marriage without public consultation in 2004.
The reporter turned on the ex-PM: “You are in support of this petition then Tony?”
“No, but they have my support.” Abbott countered.
“So Tony you don’t support them but you do?” the journalist pressed…