Monthly Archive: February 2017
Faced with increasing costs, a politically impotent leader and a country full of Australians demanding they do a better job, NBNCo thinks its finally onto a winner. You have heard of Fibre To The...
Vice President Mike Pence is preparing for a tightly packed European vacation this week, as he hopes to spend enough time with allies to find a new job when the US implodes. With Trump spouting...
There are four stages to competency in any profession. Some are benign and can be worked through, some can be fatal and the employee must be removed. The two others are normal and healthy development....
Technology superstar, Elon Musk, today announced that he would be combining some elements of SpaceX and Tesla’s revolutionary products to maintain their lead in their respective industries. SpaceX, a futuristic space delivery company with...
President Trump’s latest attempt to project power on the international stage has gone unsurprisingly awry. He is believed to have given inexperienced Secretary of State Rex Tillerson the instruction to show foreign leader whose...
Short story is that Trump was tweet warring with a fake Hitler account and seemed to miss the point. Hitler was famous for only having one ball, the other being held the Albert...
In an uncomfortable exchange with Canadian PM Justin Trudeau, Trump again showed how ill-equipped he is to carry out the duties of the President. Trudeau, calmly as ever, suggested to Trump that he would...
President Trump today signed an executive order that would legally allow wife Melania to travel on Air Force One naked. Trump is well used to flying in luxury, with his own TRUMP branded Boeing...
Mundine is a cockhead. Nobody likes him. Everyone just wants to see someone punch his lights out. He’s got a face that’s asking for it, and he just wont shut up. That’s why...
Bill Shorten today unveiled his latest zinger for the Australian public. In response to an eye-watering assault from PM Malcolm “Trumble” which left the Opposition leader quietly sobbing, he silently commissioned a team of...
West Australian Liberals today are in chaos today as the leader of the party all but conceded defeat in a private conversation overhead at a Perth coffee shop. A man, looking a lot like...
Scientists at the Central University of Bovine Studies today completed a decade long investigation into cows’ apparent ability to predict rain. The domestication of the European common cow – Bos Taurus of the Bovidae family...
What a time we live in. Of all the things we have to worry about, why is it that a satirical piece of text, written in jest, happens to suddenly become the subject of life...
Cory Bernardi, Australias most 1930’s politician, famed bigot, public hypocrite and all round ass-hat has played his hand in the Liberal Club today and walked out, hoping to congeal the worst of the party’s conservatives...
Television obsessed Trump has now spent three weeks in the White House. Yet staffers say he still doesn’t know where the bathroom is. Reportedly, he goes back to Trump Tower when he needs to...
Sources within the White House have told us that the majority of the correspondence addressed to Trump contains a glitter bomb, and that the dump-trucks full of glitter are starting to cause real problems...
Shockwaves rippled through the Politics team of Nottnews media as staff struggled to comprehend the loss of two of its favourite characters to Saturdays Trump/Bannon mass killing in Central Park earlier today. Jeremy Reporterson was...
Saturday. Central Park has always been a place to escape the pace of the city. A place to walk, talk, sit for a while, maybe run into someone famous hiding in some bushes. Today...
President Trump quietly relaxed sanctions on Russia yesterday immediately following their phone conversation. Trump disabled the White House call recording system, so no American sources could capture the contents of the call. But sources...
I suddenly like Trump. A man who has suffered through criticism after criticism. A man who beat out the best the Republican establishment has to offer. A man who has succeeded where every single...
Nottnews has secured an exclusive treat. Sources within the NSA, peeved with Trump’s recent demotion of the NSA head from his daily meeting, have leaked a transcript of the call, picked up from a...
You just cant make this stuff up. With his first week in office resulting in 20 executive orders issued and 20 executive orders retracted or challenged in court, Trump has clearly recognised that he...
Dazzled at the lightning pace this new administration delivers blow after terrible blow to our beloved USA, business experts gathered to try and decipher Trumps secrets to getting so much done. Despite hurdles such...
Researchers at the Plow Institute of Science announced today that compelling new evidence against the anti-WiFi lobby’s broad claims that electromagnetic waves have a negative impact on life. Researchers set up a scientifically acceptable...